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MARYAM SUZANA. studying diploma in accountancy in UiTM Segamat, Johor. 20 *omagaaashgaspingwithhorror. likes to go around smiling like a pervert with no buttocks

Hi, I'm Maryam. And I'm 20

Imagine writing that. Well, imagining is not enough. memang dah tercapai pun. or sampai might I say it. Dah lama tak tulis tulis kan. hehe. It's been a long time since i actually wrote. So, first things first. I'm in my fourth semester. Wait, scratch that *bunyigarugaru*. I'm going into my 5th semester dah. Part 4 dah habis dah ! Woohoo ! Okay, part 5 might be harder. But who the heck care ! One more semester to go then I'm freeeee ! Weeeee. Eh, boleh ke macam tuh. alah, lantak lantak.
So, sempene cuti yang gedabak lama ini, saya telah diambil bekerja oleh ibuku untuk jadi research assistant. So after this orang tanya "kau kerja apa?" "oh, I kerja Research Assistant" bunyi biar budget poyo sikit. Baru kena dengan suasana. So apa kerja Resarch Assistant ni ? Mungkin kerjanya memang sama dengan nama kerjanya sendiri iaitu menolong dalam research. Memang betul pun, tetapi ia bukan sekadar kerja kerani hantar surat taip buat surat turun naik lif hantar surat. Saya lebih suka begitu. Kerana at least saya tau lah kan nak buat apa. Kerja ini merangkumi:
1. Baca article yang bapook boleh tahan tulisan kecil kecil
2. Bukan hanya sekali kena baca article itu, tetapi berkali kali kerana confirm anda tak faham
3. Setelah membaca, kerana summarise pulak. bukan setiap paragraph kerana banyak info tak penting tuh. Just cari info penting yang PENTING sahaja. 
4. dah summarise ? oh anda tidak habis. anda kena baca lagi article yang ada dalam file sampai muntah membaca lebih kurang benda sama.
5. selepas itu, kene CARI article untuk buat paper sendiri yakni membuat essay berapa page tah tentang apa yang anda faham berdasarkan article berkepuk kepuk yang anda baca itu.

AMAZING BUKAN ?!

Fuuuh *laplappeluh* Itulah kerjanya. Tapi so far, not so good. Seksa hendak start baca paper pun. So saya buat kerja ini. 



    hehehehe back to top?

saya maryam suzana, cantik molek gendang gndut gendang gendut. hehe #random back to top?

hey hey ! rinduuu bloog !
it's been a long time since i opened my blog. i think it's almost 6 months. i haven't been able to wrote anything new about me because of course it's BUSY LIKE HELL.like everyone keep saying. things have been hectic. i can't keep track of everything around me and it's always gone when i decide to look around. okay,  UPDATES :
1. saya dah nak habis the second semester. lajuuu kan. my last post was just after i finished the first semester. and now it's almost the finals for the second. huihhh.
2. my life during the second semester : if you thought that doing diploma was not as hectic as doing foundation, you are totally WRONG ! it's as of you are constantly arranging an event or something. the stress is equivalent to that. so now i understand when people say they are staying up doing their final projects and stuff. 
3. what has happened in the past have taught me a lot of things. i know now that i can just be friends and not more than that. it seems that it will hurt me more than the other side. hence, the conclusion is, just be friends with everyone and trust no one more than you could ever think of.
4. i miss my friends from high school a lot. i feel guilty that i can't keep up with their life and be there when they need someone to talk to. i feel like i left out a big chunk of my life somewhere. but i've realised that people change and they meet new friends. like i did. so maybe they're happy at their own respective places with their own set of friends. let's just hope that our friendship stays forever and i am so sorry for not contacting you guys often as always.
5. this is a very long post. but what the hell, i haven't been writing in a long time. my finals are coming up this saturday and i'm not prepared at all ! what the hell ! *forgive the crude language*
6. my hair is long ! and with long hair, comes great responsibility. the process of taking care of your hair and  making sure it does not develop any unwanted smells or flakes is just tiring. i feel like chopping it off, but i likeeeee it. i spent a lot just bearing with it. why should i chop it off ?
7. okay, i'm chopping it off this evening. -____-"
8. i feel like i've gone a bit GATAL this semester. what happened to my manly hormones. it went haywire !
9. my statistics assignment is killing me ! T.T
10. i might be home longer than i may think, so i'm still thinking of ways i can actually study in this very comfortable zone.


Basically, that's all that i can update for now. that was the big picture. you haven't seen the smaller ones. it's cuter and more adorable *what the heck am i rambling about*.
okaaaay, let's just start our conclusion with a key linker *or what is it called again ?*
Hence,  i might jump in later for more updates of the traffic in my life and how i would like it to be not jammed again. therefore, babai for now. thanks for the lending ears. back to top?

AUMMMM ! 
harimau harimau JOHOR telah penat lelah berjuang demi menegakkan benang yang basah ! eh, bukan benang yang basah. menegakkan bendera yang tak berapa basah lah sangat. hahah.okay okay, mode reporter on. KARISMA 2010 telah berlangsung di UiTM Shah Alam dari 19 nov hingga 25 nov telah memberikan saya pengalaman yang amat berbeza. ape yang berbeza ? ini yang kita tak tau. eheh ;D latihan pusat kat uitm segamat. sangat menyedihkan. why you might ask ? because, i was practically left alone over there. left alone in what sense ? my friends went back home on the last day of our finals that is the 9th. and there was no one in my room. i came back from training to an empty room with noone to share my ups and downs. sumpah rase macam ape. macam lifeless corpse dah. masa tuh rasa macam nak balik pun ade lah. but gagahkan diri. sebahagian dari cabaran hidup. hahah ;D padahal cabarannya apa je. kene endure another week being alone and watching ehem ehem. hahah ;P eventhough that thing sebenarnye patuut dah get over with, but it took a long time to fly away and disappear. ANYWAAAAYS, things proceeded as planned. or not as planned. jadual yang diorang bagi macam kentut je. tak beertepatan langsung. ok pagi pagi bangun. kawad kawad walaupun tak heavy mana. then lepas kawad  breakfast and all. oh, menu breakfast normal. memang untuk orang nak training. NASI LEMAK KAWWW punya, MEE GOREEENG, pastuh tah ape yang lain. air pun best gaak. TEH TARIIIIK. sape pulak yang perut dia tak macam kilang rojak kan. semua dah campur kat dalam tuh. lepas makan makan macam kenduri aqiqah, semua kemas kemas and get ready pegi training. basically what we did during our how-many-days of training :









COMEEEEL KAN SAYA :)
hehe :)


seronok seronok kitorang masa training. hehe :) seronok pun seronok jugak. ada ups and downs. kene marah perkara biasa. i got sick. demam yang tak seberapa. tapi sakit lah jugak kepala. main pun macam tak berapa puas hati ngan performance. worked my ass off and i think it was never enough. we trained until our skins burned. basically semua boleh mengaku training lah nih sebab kulit semua shining shining macam orang minyak. siapa siapa jangan terasa k. hahah ;P baka kate my coach dulu Pn N, "semakin gelap kulit awak, semakin cerah masa hadapan". hahah :) guess it worked for some people. 


theen the day came for us to gerak to shah alam. i thought it was like going back home. pagi tuh ade penyerahan bendera and amende tah. semangat semangat lah pagi tadi. dengan berselubung our whole tracksuits nya. eventhough hall tuh ber-aircond tapi kepanasannyya tetap terasa. 








kami bahagia sangat masa nih. hehe :P i look professional. 


ohhhh, terlupa satu part. masa training, kebetulan raya haji. jadi merasa lah jugak beraya di perantauan. hahah, takde apa pun rasenya. cuma kita tak nampak muka saudara mara and ibu bapa semua. cuma nampak muka rakan rakan seperjuangan je. but, it was fine to me. except that part tumbangkan lembu tuh macam tah pape sikit. this was my conversation with aliana :


M : bukan ke lembu lembu tuh tak boleh dekat dekat masa nak sembelih ? pehal diorang letak macam tiga penjuru ?
A : agak lah. tak boleh oh diorang buat mcm tuh. kesian lembu lembu nih.
M : tengok weh. dia pandang tempat lain doh masa kawan dia kene sembelih. wait, it's lookin at me straight in the eye ! aku 
      rase dia nak bagi message doh wehh. apa agaknye dia nak cakap eh ?
A : lembu boleh bagi message ke ? -__-"
M : boleh lah ! kesian lah weh aku tengok dia. asal diorang buat macam nih ?
A : mrym ! tengok, kau dah tk boleh makan dah sekarang.
M : ASAAAAL PULAAAK ?! AKU NAAAK !
A : sebab kau dah kesian kat lembu tuh. mane boleh kesian. dah jatuh hukum haram
M : lah ye ke ? i did not know that. patutnya aku duduk je kat bawah aircond tadi. kau punya pasal lah nih.
A : aku pulaaak   -____-"


panjang kan conversation kitorang. but memang betul pun. in the end buat penat je kitorang tunggu. tak dapat makan pun.
tapi takpelah kan. experience taaau. hehe :)























OKAAAAY, ENOUGH OF PICTURES ALREADY. :)
u get the picture right. maaf jika ada yang tersinggung (tak tau asal bende nih inserted)
panjangnya post saya ini. takpe takpe, akan dicontinued kemudian. panjang lagi story taaau. babaaaaai  :)

back to top?

HAAAAI. lama tak cakap kan. finals dah habis. no talking bout finals cause i don't wanna talk about it and it frustrates me to just think about it. semester dah habis. but i'm still stuck here. mungkin sebab rajin or sayang sangat kat uitm nih. alhamdulillah, i got to play KARISMA. eventhough takde lah terroorrrrr sangat, tapi boleh lah setakat nak main tuh. hahah :P after all the fairytales here, i had to accept the fact that fairytales are actually fairytales. and they don't happen in real life. i feel empty, nothing and actually lonely. my roommates are gone and i'm the only one in my room. i feel fine being alone sebab sibuk melayan perasaan. but i cannot help but feel lost. i am trying to focus right here but it feels so wrong. my love life is in a wreck. is it even considered as live life because i think i don't have the right to feel anything. but i do feel it. i feel like what TITANIC felt when it hit that iceberg and decided to sink killing 2500 people. i feel exactly like it. the sinking feeling. maybe i should find a sink and just sink in it. MANE SINK ?! okaaay. i am trying veeeeery hard right now not to think about it. tapi macam mane pulak tak fikir. dah ade depan mata. kalau dulu, boleh lah rase macam nak pandang or tunggu, sebab ade orang yang boleh dipandang or boleh ditunggu. but now, mane ade dah. dah orang lain punya. ya allah, i beg u, please help me get through this. i just wanna be friends without my heart burning when i see him. okaaaaay daaaaah. dah habis. hahah ;D stop moaning mrym and just move on with life. shit happens and you just have to handle it. macam mane nak handle shit ? senang je. ambiik segala kotoran and campak dalam jamban and flush ! then biar syabas uruskan. enough about all the telenovela thingy. training macam separuh penat separuh tak. i have to kuruskan badan lagi. dah gemuk lembab lah maknenye. tak cukup energy nak lari. uishhhh, panjang nye post nih. penat orang nak baca. ade ke orang nak baca. hahah ;P okaaaay. that's all for now. penaaaat. lapaaaar. baaaai. 

 i find this very calming. :) back to top?

hello hello. dah lame saya tak menulis kan. eheh ;P sebab saya busy ye. tak larat nak online lama lama buat karangan. online lama lama kat fb takpe. eheh ;P dah almost 6 months saya di SEGAMAT, JOHOR. and it feels like it was yesterday hari pendaftaran. cepat sungguh masa berlalu. during the 6 months that i was here semua benda dah experience. dari susah ke senang ke mengada ngada ke ape ape lah. semua pun dah. kalau hal akademik tuh memang masa mula mula bahagia lah jugak. maklumlah tak belajar science dah. so happy lah dah tak jumpa all the crazy terms. but then, masuk pulak this thing called FAR 100. memang gembira aku tengok the text book. so tebal and lovely. at first i was forced to catchup with all my classmates and i had to learn the damn double entry in one day. memang terbaik lah. i managed. i thought accounting was all about debits and credits je. lepastuh ade this thing called income statement pulaaaak. memang tergolek lah nak buat. i felt depressed bila nak pegi class FAR 100. mase awal awal semester semangaaaat sangat nak pegi class. lepas dah lama lama, macam apa je. but that's life. and life is hard. hahah ;D that's all yang perlu diupdate for now i think. FINALS ARE COMING. nak terkentut. baaaai. :D back to top?

LALALALA, takde kerja laaaalaaaa. back to top?